Wednesday, September 7, 2011


I can remember when TV was only black and white.
When we had 3 whole channels and thought we were so lucky!

Only those people who had a child had "remote control".
As in "Timmy... change it to channel 2."
There was a TV guide magazine at the market,
which my parents refused to buy.
For heaven's sake there were only 3 channels...
how much guidance did you need?

Besides, even though he couldn't tell time...
my brother could tell you what was on every single channel at any point
in the hours we were allowed to be awake.
(Back then we kids had a "bed time" of 7:30 PM)
They only thought we didn't know it was really
mommy and daddy's time to be alone.

The point is that television was not complicated.
News shows were news shows...
not the entertainment driven drivel we get now.
Kid shows had some guy dressed up funny
doing silly stunts and playing cartoons.
They didn't bother trying to teach us a thing!
Sitcoms had simple themes...
Lucy trying to sell an alcoholic "vitamin"
supplement that turned to into drunken hilarity.

I don't get what happened.
Now we have over one hundred channels
and I still can't find anything I want to watch.
We have "on demand"
which is a nice way to see reruns and old movies
that usually aren't very good, at will.
Like we don't have enough reruns to satisfy us?

I come to detest reality shows...
I've mentioned this before, I'm sure.
Very little about them is "real".
They obviously make up drama for the show.

For example... I used to watch Orange County Choppers.
I liked seeing them create fantasy bikes.
Now I can't wait to turn off Pauls Jr and Sr.
I find their feud to be so moronic and childish that it repulses me.
Not even seeing the bikes can keep me watching that crap!
They should change their name to Dick and call it the Dueling Dick Show.

I find myself thinking that we have become so
spoiled by our abundance of choices
and the powers who fill our time slots have so little of 
worth to offer...
that we have lost our collective minds.

It used to be that what was or wasn't popular mattered
enough that what we viewed had some sense to it.
Now we follow silly patterns...
women have to be smarter than men, exhibit bitch behavior
and look like S & M hookers while kicking ass.
In commercials, men are idiots who spend money they save on buying falcons, Chinese paper armor or moose heads.
They require women to lead them around.
None of the men I know need mannies!

Okay... so I woke up on the wrong side of the bed
to Good Morning America and it set this mood in motion.
Emmet Smith was on...
the caption chosen to say who he was...
"Dancing winner".
That is hardly his greatest accomplishment
but sadly, that is probably how most of America
knows him now... as a contestant on a dance off.

I need coffee.
I'm going back to making myself blind with my 3-D puzzle.
I'm not turning the TV back on.


  1. "Now we follow silly patterns...
    women have to be smarter than men, exhibit bitch behavior
    and look like S & M hookers while kicking ass.
    In commercials, men are idiots who spend money they save on buying falcons, Chinese paper armor or moose heads.
    They require women to lead them around."

    THANK YOU! On behalf of all men, I say a huge, hearty THANK YOU!

    You didn't wake up grumpy. You woke up smart. Would that more might do the same each day.

  2. i started watching lexx this week and now i wonder why i hadn't really heard of it before now.

    i've named the mighty hyundai lexx!

  3. Heh, heh... I always loved the line from Nobody Home... you know the one:

    I've got 13 channels of shit on the tv to choose from... choose from... choose from

    i have no idea how many channels we have. A lot. I almost never watch them. The kids watch PBS and Nick. My wife watches HGTV. I occasionally watch the news or the weather.

    On the rare occasion I do feel like vegging in front of the set and nobody else is watching or recording at the time, I watch fishing shows, or sometimes hunting shows, on demand. I dunno... I find them relaxing.

    Never been hunting myself, but I don't see how it's all that different from fishing... I mean, aren't you "hunting" the fish?

  4. billy pilgrim- lexx? I've never heard of it. I'll look into it.

  5. Cricket- We watch those too. I mean the hunting and fishing ones. I consider fishing to be sort of a zen thing... the water sounds and sights, being at peace and wondering if there are really fish there.
    I haven't been hunting yet... but am going this year. I have a fear of being alone in open spaces, so it should be interesting to say the least. The man assures me that my radio will keep me connected to everyone else, so I won't be alone. My biggest fear is meeting a bear for the second time... and this time not having a fish to throw at it so that it doesn't want to eat me.

  6. Guess you won't be watching the reboot of Charlie's Angels?

  7. Just watch football from now until February and you will be fine. There is a reason why they call it an idiot box. Kyle loves some cartoons so we have to be careful that we limit how much he watches. It is hard because TVs make such good babysitters.=) Have a good weekend.

  8. NoRegrets- Ha. Not likely.

    Mr.Shife- Great advice! That is pretty much what I do this time of year. =:]
    I see nothing wrong with cartoons for kids, but you are wise to limit how much. You want their imaginations and creativity to have time to develop. I'm betting that watching Kyle is a great mom and dad sitter! He's just too cute.
    You have a great weekend too.

  9. I almost never watch TV. If I watch a series it's usually The Twilight Zone or Andy Griffith streaming on Netflix. Yes, I know that means I'm old, but I can't take all that screeching in reality shows.

  10. Hey, email me if you want to get some info about potential opportunities in your state. Sounds like a spam comment, but I'm serious. I would email you but I don't see an address, and I dropped you off of FB (sorry! I regret that now! ;-) ). If you remember my name... friend me on FB

  11. Churlita- We tend to watch a lot of old series too. I'm with you on the screeching! I don't like that kind of drama in my life, so why would I want to watch others do it?

  12. NoRegrets- I will do that. Thank you! No problem about the FB thing. We'll fix that. =:]

  13. i hardly know what's on. i so rarely get control of the remote and care so little.

  14. I'm one of those people who always has on a TV for noise, even when I'm reading. Is that sick or what?. I watch crime/forensics shows, some food reality shows, horror, science fiction, news... The TV is my friend.