Monday, June 9, 2014


I found this jolly guy on penterist.
Peculiar things are a foot.
Call it a run of not terribly bad luck.
For example:
Last Saturday was my second of two days off in a row.
I was determined to get some overdue house chores finished.
I got up, and got busy.
I went to start the dishwasher and recalled
that I was not thrilled with the detergent packs
I had gotten at the dollar store.
Sometimes you win there, sometimes you lose.
Off I went to the Store about six blocks away.
It was hot, so I drove.
I wanted to get in and out... no sight seeing.
I parked,
 walked inside and straight to the dishwasher soap isle.
I was almost to the check out near my car
when the lure of pretty flowers trapped my interest.
Ok, I told myself.
One small, inexpensive plant.
As soon as I walked out to the nursery area...
I saw them.
I nabbed them up and was  hardly a tick off schedule.
I slid into my hot car.
We're talking temperature.
I delighted in imagining the cool air
that would be blowing on me as I hauled my keys up to
select my ignition key.
I must take a moment here to expalin that there was a
recall on my year and make of car.
Something in the ingition makes it do things
that can cause it to crash.
Chevy assured us that if we did not put anything
but the ignition key into the ingition...
no possiblity of crashing weirdness was possible.
And as soon as the part arrived,
the joker ignition would be replaced for free.
I was terrified of losing my key if it had to be solo
while its key friends hung out on the key fob.
Those keys are spendy!
They have a security chip in them that allows the key to start the car.
I decided that I needed a clip that I could use to clip and unclip the key
and keep my keys together.
It worked so well.
At least until I made my jaunt down the aisles of the market.
I looked at my keys and it was not on its clever little hook.
Well crap!
Back I go, not worried because I had taken no more than ten minutes.
How far can a key go in that much time?
Apparently it can go to hell.
No matter how many times I walked the same path,
it refused to be there.
I asked all the cashiers... the service desk... any associate I saw.
I had no choice but to walk in the heat, that I sought to avoid, home.
Did I ever tell you that I take a medication that causes
sun sensitivity?
I can burn in as little as 15 minutes.
I had also washed my hair just before I began my sad journey.
Wet head... exposing more scalp.
By the time I got home,
my hair was dry but my scalp was pig nose pink.
I got my spare key and had no choice but to walk back.
Did it occur to me to put on a cap or scarf?
Heck no!
I had things to get done.
I was in a hurry and this was holding me up.
I did not think anything about my hair,
let alone the sun.
My mind was awhirl with visions of the cost of replacing that key.
By the time Otto Mobile and I returned, my head was more the shade of
fresh spanked naked butt...
a shade I recall clearly from childhood.
I did my chores and fell into bed after diner.
I was pooped.
I actually felt the intensity of the burn at the moment,
after oversleeping, that I finished my shower and
grabbed the brush to drag thru
my once again wet head.
It certainly woke me up quickly.
sun bruned head is not a good motivational tool.
I launched off to work using my spare without a spare key.
I made up for my lateness on the freeway.
I chuckled to myself at my awesome ability to still
make it to work on time as I slid
Otto into a prime parking space.
My not terribly bad luck streak was over.
Whoo Hoo!
Sadly the thrill died when I pulled on my door handle and
it came off in my hand.
Such is life.
Hope you all had a glorious and grand weekend
in the company of folk who love you to pieces.

Saturday, June 7, 2014


Avery speaks.
Again, my apologies...
My computer has not been acting well
and would not let me post for some
reason beyond my ability to figure out.
Today it is being kind.
Above is the small yet loud Avery,
who has begun to speak.
She will be heard!
She is also crawling and on the move.
Nothing is safe.
Look at those cheeks!
<*)))<   <*)))<   <*)))<
At the Big Dub-Ya things have been
I have come to the conclusion that the 
meth heads are in high spirits
because the weather is warm enough
not to have to pay power bills.
They have that au de cat piss that is unmistakable.
They also have a distinct shopping style.
They are somewhat obsessive.
One might select a tee shirt it likes and then
fill the cart with every single tee of that kind...
leaving an empty shelf behind.
(This is not at all suspicious!)
They fill the cart with things they like,
sit on the floor and sort through
their treasures for hours.
(Doesn't everyone do this?)
We call them "Pretty Birdies" because they
 are like magpies or crows
that gather things because they find them
pretty, shiny, etc.
They do not see this as odd behaviour,
though... it is.
They are stealing while they do this.
I guess the idea might be that if you fill one cart full of one type of shirt,
how will we ever be able to tell that they have
stuffed just one into their bulging back packs.
The same back packs they showed up with
that were saggy and flat when they came in.
I don't know why, but this is the time of year
for pretty birdies.
I wonder if they are free to get high
because school is ending for the year...
Summer living is cheaper and they have
more money to get high...
subsidized in part by thieving...
'cause you know there is never enough money
to get high.
Whatever causes it...
the Pretty Birdies have returned
to the Big Dub-Ya.
I get to put back all their loot.
I guess I should be grateful...
job security and all that.
There is no real other news.
Life is kind of dull right now.
Better dull than sorry.