Hello whoever wandered in today! I've been gone a long time, so I don't expect much activity. 

A brief recap... My husband passed 1 year and 9 months ago from injuries from the fire we had in our home and resulted in my sort of homelessness for about 6 months. 

I moved home a bit over a year ago. People ask me "Isn't it weird living where your husband died?"

No. He passed away in a coma in a hospital over one hundred miles away. I would never fear the spirit of someone who loved me in life anyway. Kind of a rude question if you ask me. Sheesh!

They ask "Are you afraid to live alone?"  No. See that pink and white smiling pit bull up there? That's Piglet. She's my security crew and life companion. She's sweet as pie unless she senses unease in me or something amiss in our surroundings. This came in handy in a dark parking lot one night when we were living in motels after the fire. We were approached by two large homeless men from behind, asking me to let them into the motel security foyer. Piglet let out a low rumble that stopped them from coming closer. I've never heard a more disturbing sound. It stopped me in my tracks as well, since I had no idea that the men were behind me. Pig is with me and I am safe.

They ask "How are you?"  The meaning behind that are implies that I must be crackers by now. I am not fond of that question.

This brings us to the present. 

I am fine. I do miss Randy every single day. I always will. However, there is nothing to do but continue forward motion. When the fire happened, Mom (Who actually owns my house, allowing me to live here by her grace and kindness) told me to use the insurance money to make the house whatever I wanted it to be. It was fun to redesign my floor plan and add what I wanted where I wanted. I picked out everything from the floor up and out. Watching my plan unfold was a rare delight!

Halfway thru the remodel I was able to move back in. That doesn't normally happen due to insurance concerns and getting in the way of the workers. However, we used a contractor in the family and the workers were mostly family too. Except Richie, but he gets a pass due to his sense of humor. 

It was healing to have so many people around and all the clangs and bangs. The end result is a home that is calm and peaceful. One half expects to find a long beach and ocean when you step onto my deck. I wasn't able to live at the ocean, but I can recreate the feel of a terminal vacation. So that's what I aimed for at completion. I'm so glad that it satisfied my need for peace and contentment. It is perfect for me.

That pretty much brings you up to date. My world is smaller. People make me nervous. I'm in no hurry to be at large events or to travel alone. But that is okay with me. My greatest joy has always been my family. My son, Boo, lives a block away. He does my yard work along with his sister, Bear. I have two other sons, Swell and Squeaky who live 30 and 40 minutes away. We have cousin sleepover parties for their kids here roughly twice a month. My ex comes up to do handyman stuff. I pay for his services with home cooked meals that he craves. The kids call him "Old Man". The call me "Crazy Old Bat". These are terms of endearment. Ha!

There really isn't a lot going on to shout about on the day to day. Piglet is here only because of the prescription written by my doctor for an emotional support animal. Pit Bulls are not allowed in the 55+ community where I live. If you're a dog owner, you are aware of the let me out, let me in of dog ownership. Here, because of the rules, if Piglet is out, I must be out. I spend a lot of time on my patio that overlooks her private yard. She sleeps in the sun while I have my morning coffee and play my brain games. We do that off and on several times a day. It is important to me that she has a full and happy life. She has regular play dates with Squeaky's dog Bowie. And there is the river trail that she loves to walk. I've become a total pit bull mom. 

That's it for today. I'm not sure how often I will post, but at least once a week. So I'll leave you today with a very rare picture of myself as I look now. Give you a face for a change.